To be a good manager you have to be a people person, someone who is capable of interacting with others. In order to be an effective leader you must be willing listen to other people’s suggestions and make them feel worthy.
You must be able to sympathize with your employees and those you supervise. The keyword being “sympathize” Some people are not capable of sympathizing. They are so confident in their own coping skills so they think you should be, but they have taken confidence too far. Read about building confidence.
These are some poor leadership traits every manager should avoid and not caring about the feelings of others is probably the number one poor management trait.
Narcissism is a combination of personality traits but the person usually concentrates on himself. A narcissistic person is mostly concerned about “me, me, me” They concentrate on everything that is going to help them. I would not ask them for advice unless the solution benefits them. They are poor sympathizers.
Narcissism and self-deception are survival mechanisms without which many of us might just jump off a bridge.
I know you have met someone like this. We normally call them conceited. Some of them may appear arrogant. Read more about confidence vs arrogance. Have you met an arrogant person? How did you deal with them? Did you tell them how you felt (but kept it clean).
A manager is someone who can get the job done with little resistance. A good manager does not have to tell people over and over again to do the same thing. Employees usually respond to the person who respects their character, not someone who tries to manage every small detail of the job. Read more about micro-managing.
I hate to be micro-managed. If you have to be in control of every aspect of the job, I think you may as well be doing the job yourself. If I heard a manager say these words, “If you want it done right, You have to do it yourself“, they may as well prepare themselves to be tired because I would be watching them do most of my jobs.
How do you deal with micro-managers? Do you think people who like to micro-manage suffer from personality disorders?
Have you me a passive aggressive micro-manager?
How a narcissist can damage a work environment:
Narcissism has no place in a work environment, because those are the people who we call “back-stabbers”. I would not be able to trust a narcissist person for that reason alone. I would always be careful with what I tell them. Have you ever met a person who is always running to the boss to tell them something you did?
Some narcissistic people will tell the smallest thing on you becaause they think it will help them move up the chain in management. I have talked to “real” supervisors before and they do not like people who tell anymore than I do, because they know if they will tell something that small they can not be trusted.
I know a person who would pretend to be your best friend in your face but because he is a notorious “tell-tale” no one would divulge any personal information with him. The way I see it if he makes it to management he has already lost the respect of his line staff.
What can you learn from a narcissist:
The lesson here for a leader, is do not burn your bridges with people who you may manage one day.
I know you have met similar people. If you want to share a story without mentioning names please leave me a comment.
I do not understand why people tell things that are so trivial. For example I saw Mike using the computer to send a private email. You have got to be kidding me. What could a person possibly gain from monitoring another employee’s computer usage. If a person done that to me, I would never do anything out of policy around them again.
I think they are doing more harm to employees work moral than making sure the job stays progressive. A person who does that is more than likely headed for isolation because the more people they cross the more isolated they will become.
Has a co-worker double crossed you? Do you still deal with them? Do you think this behavior is productive or counter-productive?
Do you agree with me about narcissism or do you feel differently? How do you feel about micro-managers? Please share your leadership theories.
Do have any narcissistic traits?
Leave a comment below about anything you read. I hope you can identify because all of my management stories are experiences I have had.